Trip to Baja

The leaders of our trip to Mexico encouraged us to "write a little about our trip"--no further guidance. One of the things that initially motivated us to go on this trip was the fact that we could do it as a family. I believe there were some family specific things that took place during those four days, though I'm convinced that what God was able to do in each of our lives was more crucial. I started to put together some words to capture a little of my experience; if you're interested, keep reading (sorry, it's not in iambic pentameter).

The four days or so I was there I found it difficult to define myself by what I did, what I had, or my reputation. The more I tried to evaluate the trip in terms of what I accomplished, the extent to which I 'enjoyed' myself, or how I would be remembered by those I met (which is the usual context of how I ascertain the extent to which my conduct is acceptable), the more paradoxical my 'normal' behavioral model became. I began to realize that the habits and routines to which I concede freedom and spontanaety impart an un-natural sense of comfort--and that the multitudinous tasks in which I engage daily to achieve a sense of self worth probably do more to mar the image of who I should be becoming than reflect that image.

My perspective was that the cup of fru-fru coffee, hot water shower, freeway commute in personally-owned motorized climate-controlled conveyance, uniform respect recieved and shared with co-workers, and the belief that I was at least giving my best effort--to the extent that I had (or didn't have) these every day in my life was the extent to which I could gage the general 'happiness' of my life. Engaging in some non-narcissistic activity in another country with some folks from my church seemed like it should be a natural extention of this 'happy' life. However, I suddenly felt that I had the substance of tracing paper when confronted with the question of what motivated me to sign up for the trip. An initial response (automatic or impulsive?) was, "Because it's the right thing to do." Mmmm. That answer truly comforted me about as much as a cup of fru-fru coffee truly comforts me. And though the "why must I do..." of my choices had hitherto seemed to be secondary to the "what must I do..," I had this avalanching sense that I'd been asking these questions in the reverse order for so long that perhaps my perspective was not redeemable.

Well, in the fellowship of God's people, and uneasily resigned to answer the "why" question with God's grace extended towards me in the form of obedience, I am a little more entrenched on the road that sojourns towards transformation because God gave me the courage to acknowledge the practical transparency of my non-Kingdom value set. Along the way, a sliver of joy shone through a slightly cracked barricade to my heart that I suspect is comprised mostly of pride and selfishness. Now, looking back, what I yearn for is more of that joy. It seems ludicrous to contemplate how intoxicating that sliver was and is, and how mercifully it was bestowed on such dubious conviction--compared to the comfort and general 'happiness' that seemed to compel me on the trip before I actually went on it. The more important aspects of this trip to me are now vested in who I went with, who I met there, and Who asked me to go (He was there the whole trip as well, of course). I'm inclined to believe that I have already experienced a little Eternity through God's invitation to live in His Kingdom...

Semper Fi, JarHedJon

Still Uncertain

Again, the time is flying by faster than I can account for it. The job I submitted my resume for is currently on hold due to contract negotiations, I've been in communication with them regarding the time within which I must recieve a firm answer. They forwarded a benefits package to me, so at least that is something. In the meantime, I am taking the steps necessary to extend my orders with my current command for another two years (should I not obtain private sector employment by May 15th). My command is aware of the possiblitily that I may find a job, but for a variety of reasons has been pretty straight forward about their desire for me to stay on orders. This week begins a week of "field training," or about as close as Corps-level staff officers get to "the field," these are times that are always challenging, always provide great opportunities to learn, and generally enhance the staff's ability to work as a team.
We wrapped up our projects (for the short term) on the house up north, after putting in laminate flooring in the kitchen, dining room, entryway, and hallway, and recarpeting two of the bedrooms. Still left to do is solve the closet door problems in two of the bedrooms (there aren't any) and a ducting problem involving adequate conduct of climate control to the 2nd floor.
Over Spring Break we went to Baja on a four day trip to do some painting and construction with a church we have partnered with in a suburb of Tiajuana. Joshua acted as our interpreter, and did an outstanding job. It was a stretching experience, with God teaching us a little of how every culture experiences brokenness in different ways, and how we are called to be the body of Christ to each other so God can continue the process of sanctification in each of us.
In many ways, re-entering family life has been simlarly challenging. Transitioning from a life that is startingly Spartan, mission oriented, one dimensional and primarily predictable to one that is multitudinous, rich, replete with options and relationship based is no easy task, and I appreciate your continued prayers (for me AND my family). Thanks.

Semper Fi, JarHedJon

Time Window

Well, I can hardly believe it's been over a month since I last posted, but time has been flying by for me. I have been overwhelmed by the depth, breadth, and sincerity of all the "Welcome Home" greetings I have recieved, and the number of you that prayed for me (and are still praying for me). I have found it difficult to transition from a 'one dimensional life' of the deployment to the multi-faceted complex and many-optioned life of family, job, community, school, church, etc...
I have a short time window in which to pursue private sector employment. If I can find a job that will provide adequate income to support our continued residence in our current living situation, I will take that option and revert to active reserve status. I have posted my resume on a well reputed job search web site, and have recieved a few 'hits.' I've also been referred by a collegue to a job (the job description is something that I think I would enjoy and would utilize some of my stronger skillsets) where I would support Marine Corps commands from outside the Corps--and have proceeded past the 'initial interview' stage. The 'front man' for the corporation has informed me that if I don't hear anything from the 'second' stage of the process by Friday (April 6th) to touch base with him for a status report. Please pray with me, Sheryl and Joshua regarding this opportunity. I am getting 'mixed messages' from my current command as to whether or not continuted active service would result in deployment for a year in 2008, so it would be nice to dispel the need for concern with a non-deployable job.
Thanks for sticking with this blog, and I'll see if I can't get back into a more regular posting habit.

Semper Fi, JarHedJon